I Don't Know if I Wanna Post my Nonsense! (:

My friend told me to write a hard to understand e-mail to someone randomly. This is what I came up with.

So I'm at my grandma's right? And she sends me to find her shoes. I guess she lost them in a stratus cloud. So, like a good little girl, I run to fetch them. I climb up the never-ending stairs and step into K-Mart. Ring, ring. It's my mother dearest.
"Where are you?"
"Washington D.C."
"What?!" My mom promptly freaks out.
"Oh, don't worry. I have my noteworthy design tucked safely away in Miami."
"Oh!" she lets out a gust of relieved C02. "Tell your duck I said hi." So I hang up and start walking away from the K-mart. My duck is nowhere to be found. She's probably hibernating with her friends. I step into the busy street and dodge Superman as he flies super-sonically fastly by. I wave and scowl. Superman isn't as neato as my Elvis impersonator friend thinks. Sometimes I hate my brain, I mutter to my indulgent mind. I silently make a vow to kill every pigeon that has ever lived as one flies by my ear. I shoot out a limb and kick it. It does a double back-flip and then bounces on the ground like a rubber bouncy ball. I immediately feel euphoric and jog the rest of the way to the Toast Emporium.
My pocket vibrates and I answer my phone. Somebody I don't know says: In Gulliver's Travels Jonathan Swift described the two moons of Mars, Phobos and Deimos, giving their exact size and speeds of rotation. He did this more than 100 years before either moon was discovered.I blink in shock."Hum. I learned that last year in Sunday School."
"I know you did."
"Who is this?" I ask with a slight tremor in my voice.
"Your worst nightmare. Muahha--" I promptly hang up to give him the burn of never finishing his evil laugh. I run, run until my legs burn. I take a seat in the Emporium and ask the kid seated next to me if he's ever been lonely in a crowded room. He gawks at me and then scoots over a couple of seats away.
It was then that I saw my Grandma's pink shoes on the kids feet. My pupils get smaller and my nostrils flare. I jump up and grab him by the fro, he shrieks and shields his mouth. My scowl deepens and I yell ""Inventario II" ("Inventory II") compiles the poems in Spanish that Mario Benedetti wrote from 1986 to 1991. But... who is Benedetti?. That is an extremely pertinent question, especially in the USA, where not many people know him (unfortunately for them, I might add). He is a very gifted poet and writer, born in Uruguay in 1920, who had to abandon his country for quite a few years due to a military dictatorship in his country... In my opinion, some of his books are wonderful, and "Inventario II" is one of them. I generally don't like poetry, but after borrowing this book from a friend out of curiosity, I decided to buy it!"
I let go of his fro and take off his blue shoes (they change colors). I look back as I walk out of the double doors. A single tear rolls down my hot cheek as I throw a dryer sheet to him. I jog back to Washington DC and give my grandma her shoes. Then I walk to school. ...I had a good day.